Title: Love is not Rude
Love is not Rude
1 Corinthians 13:4–8 (ESV)
4 Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant
5 or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;
6 it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth.
7 Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.
8 Love never ends…
I was going to use another story or two for as a sermon launch pad, but Holden from Oregon gave me a better illustration of rudeness.
After a play was over last night, the Oregon receiver spit on the OSU cornerback, Igbinosun. It was unsportsmanlike conduct and an automatic ejection from the game.
Let’s see how his behavior stacks up against Greek definitions.
to act in defiance of social and moral standards, with resulting disgrace, embarrassment, and shame
to act contrary to the standard=behave disgracefully, dishonorably, indecently
The same word is used earlier in Paul’s letter.
1 Corinthians 7:36 (ESV) — 36 If anyone thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed, if his passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin
John Sherwood tells the story of living in the Philippines as a missionary.
We spent our early meals in the Philippines with Filipino kids glued to our windows watching our every bite while making comments in strange tongues. This was not considered rude for them. In fact, to leave us alone would have been rude. The Filipinos could not imagine wanting personal privacy. We even learned to enjoy our neighbors’ music as they generously shared with us through open windows. This intrusion into the missionary’s personal space can especially bother those in the early days of their adjustment. We can laugh about these things now, but it was a different story when we first moved to the Philippines.
1 Samuel 25:1–3 (ESV)
1 …Then David rose and went down to the wilderness of Paran.
2 And there was a man in Maon whose business was in Carmel. The man was very rich; he had three thousand sheep and a thousand goats. He was shearing his sheep in Carmel.
3 Now the name of the man was Nabal, and the name of his wife Abigail. The woman was discerning and beautiful, but the man was harsh and badly behaved; he was a Calebite.
1 Samuel 25:9–13 (ESV)
9 When David’s young men came, they said all this to Nabal in the name of David, and then they waited.
10 And Nabal answered David’s servants, “Who is David? Who is the son of Jesse? There are many servants these days who are breaking away from their masters.
11 Shall I take my bread and my water and my meat that I have killed for my shearers and give it to men who come from I do not know where?”
12 So David’s young men turned away and came back and told him all this.
13 And David said to his men, “Every man strap on his sword!” And every man of them strapped on his sword. David also strapped on his sword. And about four hundred men went up after David, while two hundred remained with the baggage.
Proverbs 10:14 (ESV)
14 The wise lay up knowledge, but the mouth of a fool brings ruin near.
In what ways did Jesus demonstrate that He was not “Rude”?
Matthew 9:9–13 (ESV) — 9 As Jesus passed on from there, he saw a man called Matthew sitting at the tax booth, and he said to him, “Follow me.” And he rose and followed him. 10 And as Jesus reclined at table in the house, behold, many tax collectors and sinners came and were reclining with Jesus and his disciples. 11 And when the Pharisees saw this, they said to his disciples, “Why does your teacher eat with tax collectors and sinners?” 12 But when he heard it, he said, “Those who are well have no need of a physician, but those who are sick. 13 Go and learn what this means, ‘I desire mercy, and not sacrifice.’ For I came not to call the righteous, but sinners.”
Luke 18:15–17 (ESV) — 15 Now they were bringing even infants to him that he might touch them. And when the disciples saw it, they rebuked them. 16 But Jesus called them to him, saying, “Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God. 17 Truly, I say to you, whoever does not receive the kingdom of God like a child shall not enter it.”
Think about it:
Let’s consider our greetings to people. Are they warm and truly friendly? Do we show genuine respect? Are they hypocritical?
What does our body language tell people? Are we rude in this way?
Are we aware of what others “think” is offensive and rude? Colossians 4:5 (ESV) — 5 Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time.
Jeffery Forrey writes,
You must be concerned about being “gentle” (v. 2). Gentleness is the opposite of being harsh, rude, or domineering. A gentle person tenderly watches out for others with whom he has contact, taking care not to insult, belittle, or demean them. When confronting sin in a fellow believer, the gentle Christian will be firm, but never attacking, in his approach.
Lou Priolo writes:
In some cultures of the world, it’s considered rude to look people in the eyes. In our culture, it’s generally considered rude not to look at people when talking to them.
Psalm 32:8 (ESV) I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you.
As much as possible, make it a habit to practice “Stop, Look, and Listen” when your wife is addressing you. Stop what you’re doing when she begins talking to you (i.e., put down the newspaper or magazine, turn off the television set, etc.), look her directly in the eyes, and listen intently to what she’s saying to you.
What verses can help you fight and defeat, “Rudeness”?
1 Peter 3:8–11 (ESV)
8 Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind.
9 Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing.
10 For “Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit;
11 let him turn away from evil and do good; let him seek peace and pursue it.
1 Peter 3:12–14 (ESV)
12 For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayer. But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”
13 Now who is there to harm you if you are zealous for what is good?
14 But even if you should suffer for righteousness’ sake, you will be blessed. Have no fear of them, nor be troubled,
Q&A Starters
The Corinthian problems
- Disunity (1 – 4)
- Tolerant (5)
- Lawsuits with believers (6:1-11)
- Sexual Immorality (6:12-20)
- Marriage and singles (7)
- Christian Liberty (8-10)
- Roles, clothing, and culture (11:1-16)
- Abuse at the worship service (11:17-34)
- Abuse of Spiritual Gifts (12-14)
- 10.False Resurrection teaching (15)